Sam writes…

Hi I’m Sam
I have struggled with anxiety, depression and well Nef like thoughts (idk if I’m allowed to say it ) for over 2 and a half years.

When I was 10 my teacher read the class wolf brother, I fell in love with it. The story, the characters, the setting all of it! It was a big turning point in my sense of self. I felt like I found what I like and what my morals are. As my lovely teacher was very slow at reading the most amazing book I found, I got my own copy of the book and read the rest in 5-6 days. On Christmas I got the books up to ghost hunter and my birthday (very close to Christmas) vipers daughter and skin taker. And I read them all in 3 months

Later that same year i got in trouble with the head teacher, and I was deeply hurt by the shouting and the questions and the looks of shame. Later on I read the books to keep my mind off it. In the summer holidays I turned servely depressed and I didn’t want to be here. In my darkest moments of that summer I lived for the book series, it kept me grounded.

In year seven I got help, but the mental health system on my island are very slow. Year 8 was bad again hit with anxiety and I was ashamed when I didn’t go out. I felt like it would never end. Another dark moment came along where I made a choice. I chose to stay on this earth and I chose because of the COAD and how I wanted to keep reading and learning and laughing when torak falls over.
Later in that year something unfortunate happened to me, and the culprit was a friend who once read the book. I read the books again and felt seen by,

Currently I am still struggling with my mental issues as well as my diagnosis of autism and adhd, but I’m hoping it will get better and obviously with COAD by my side
Thank you Michelle paver for putting your books out there and indirectly helping a random kid with issues

(I’m seeing professionals you don’t need to worry, and COAD is my special interest if u couldn’t tell)

Dear Sam, Thank you so much for your message, in which you vividly describe what you’ve been going through.  I am really sorry that you’ve been having such a rough time – and I’m glad that my books have helped  you, and are continuing to do so.  I’m even more glad that you are getting some help and support.  And by the way, it shows considerable empathy that you thought to reassure me on this point; otherwise, I would have worried.

Growing up can be incredibly tough.  I know because I’ve been through it; and I’ve put some of that into how Torak feel during his dark times.  But things do get better – and they will for you.  From your message, you strike me as strong, perceptive, self-aware, intelligent, resilient and brave.  You will win through, and life will get better.  In the meantime, thank you so much for having the courage to share your experiences.  Stay steady, and may you have many more healing times in the Forest with Torak, Renn and Wolf at your side!  With very best wishes, Michelle.  (P.S. As we’ve had problems in the past with gmail messages not getting through, please could you send a brief acknowledgement so that I know you’ve received this one!)